A Lack of Oxygen

As you read this list of song titles, I want to think about their meaning. 

Take my breathe away - Berlin (Not Jessica Simpson)

No Air - Jordin Sparks

The Air That I Breathe - The Hollies

Now let me take this and spin it to what I think they really mean. 

I am one of the 1/3 Americans (according to a survey I made up for this blog) that suffer from Sleep Apnea, we know the truth behind these lyrics. Let me lay out a scenario for you. 

I (in a timely fashion) ready myself for bed. The covers are pulled back, the pillows are fluffed and I lay down on the left side of my bed (its my routine, and its adorable). The right side of my bed stays pretty well untouched throughout the night. As I sort through the veritable bevy of late 90's alt rock/pop lyrics, I slowly fade. As the eyelids get heavy and my body is winding down, I take deep, drawn-out breaths. A couple of minutes and I will be in a cylce of sleep........

But just when I get that, my body laughs, it says, and I quote, "Haha, you think your lungs will still work then you aren't conscious? You are wrong!" And right then, the struggle for my life begins. For the next eight hours, I experience things that can't be seen unless on an operation table at the hospital. I go up to a minute without breathing and just when its almost too late, I fight through and make it to the next breath!

And that is why I hate Jessica Simpson...oh, you don't follow me? Her (awful, horrendous, terrible, pathetic) remake of a great song is a slap in the face. It isn't music that she is singing, it is a blend of fear and sadness. 

Thank you Jessica Simpson! You have taken what was once treasured and turned it into a mockery.

 

Oh The Night That Changed It All...

Writing is therapy! So thats what I aim to convey. There are things in life that we do and people view them from their own vantage point and make assumptions. And all too often, I am guilty of sympathizing with, and changing what I do to appease others...but no more. 

As I sit at my desk writing this, I am exhausted. This weekend was wrought with late nights, early mornings and countless smiles. But whatever the moment, whoever the company, my mind was filled with thoughts of her. Even though at times she was sitting next to me, I was thinking about her. There seems to be a correlation between the speed of heart beat and her proximity to me! 

"So rest my heart she is waiting for you

Close my eyes and breath again

It won't be long till she is in your arms

You can't be close enough"

So it has happened! There seems to be no explanation. Saturday night changed it all. 

Fear...

I just watched "The Strangers"
Dumb idea. I hate scary movies, and now I can't help but think about it all the time.
Sleep is over rated, but this fear has made me think. And this song speaks to the fear in me!

Paddy Casey - Fear
So Lord please forgive me if my fear offend now
It's just so hard to transcend now
Cause when i ran away from my bad dream
The child inside was too scared and screamed

And I pray my child, live happy and long, Lord
And I hope she never, will sing this song....

To The One Person I Hope Will Read This

Time is constant, it ebbs and flows, there is something about it that is comforting and more about it that sparks timidity. There seems to be an unspoken respect for the vast uncertainty that time brings. Yet in spite of this feeling of angst, there is something in me that screams to rise up, grab this intangible concept of time and let it know that I am not restricted to its bounds.

There are things in life, people in life and events that are much to important and worthwhile to let the future decide. To take every day as it comes, to not spend time thinking about the "what may come" and to passionately pursue the "what is now", can be liberating.

Yet most people seem to be caught in the monotony of allowing the ticking of a clock, or the rise and fall of the sun that has not happened to determine the outcome of their decisions in the moment. Take heart in knowing that the God who has numbered our days does not let us know what all of them hold! He has a plan, that if we knew about, would find a way to screw up!

Here are the things that I care about and so desperately want to know as constant that I must take day by day!

• Accomplishing my goals in life in every aspect
• Meeting other peoples expectations
• Increasing my quality of life
• Enjoying the times when I am alone
• Examing my heart to know that I am where God wants me to be!

Those who wish to sing, always find a song!

May the song of your life, resonate through eternity!

Louisville, Kentucky

The Bluegrass State, I found myself on a plane to it. I was spending the weekend away on a mini-vacation. Here's a rundown of my time there...

• Lou (Small dog) became my best friend...
• I went to my first big college football game
• Ate at "The Irish Rover" and was amazed
• Successfully doubled the amount of flights I have been on in my life
• Ended the weekend perfectly! 

Louisville, Kentucky. Quaint little (big) town (city) that is over-all pretty impressive. I recommend a visit. 

Highlights Of My Day

This will be short and sweet!

Things about my day that make it better than yours.

1. Waking up and watching SportsCenter before school.
2. Being at school and feeling like I learned something.
3. Being counter-productive this afternoon with Kyle
4. Hanging out at my place with the people I like the most.
5. Sitting on the couch and singing while someone listens.
6. Having a dinner party and eating superfluous pepperoni's.
7. Cuddling!!!

That is all....

I can't stop smiling.

Hark! The Herald...Christmas Music Already?

Its October, its not cold outside, Haloween has not occured, and Baseball is still being played...what does this mean? It means, its not time for CHRISTMAS music. But, despite what I feel and think, it is already happening.

I went to a meeting today to plan this years annual, Christmas Concert. Now, in and of themselves, Christmas carols are not horrible. But when Michael W. Smith gets his filthy mits on them, thats when they really become amazing (enter sarcasm here). I sat and listened to songs that simply confounded me. To think that people can willingly sit and listen to that type of music and not automatically become jealous of Helen Keller, is a mystery.

No matter what happens, I'm sure I will just hold my tongue, smile, and play the music and try to forget about it immediately. Let it be known...If I see Michael W. Smith, I will have words....

At Church All Day!!!

This morning I rolled out of bed, Got dressed in natty atire (jeans, t-shirt and JACKET). I was so excited that it was cool enough (and so was I) to wear a jacket. I got in my obviously stylish ride and headed to work. 

Now, most people work 9a-5p or a little longer and go home to dinner and bed. But do I get to do that? NO WAY!!! I get to my office at 8a-9a, then go to meetings, do paperwork, e-mail people for the day, eat a quick lunch, and then start getting ready for youth!

This translates into a 13 hour day at work. Now, as long as that sounds, I get free meals, and I get to do amazing stuff like, record and write music. Its ideal.  

Today, I felt really good because I have been inspired :) to write a lot of new songs and I got to record them today. I am pretty pumped. My night will be over at 6p and then I get to go home, watch TV, do some homework, and then drift off to sleep. Overall, I think I have it pretty good.

-Free food + Song writing + Facebooking = Awesome!

I Swear She Makes Me Quiet....

Today, I am in the midst of a hard day at work. I had staff chapel at 9:15 am and went straight from there to CPR/First Aid Training and by the time I woke up from that lull, it was 12:30 pm and I have gotten nothing accomplished. I am now racing the clock to to try and get chord charts made, planning center all lined up and figure out what to do in my guitar lesson today. Why is it that the smallest of tasks seem huge in light of time shortage? 

This weekend was so long and I came to realize one thing...the importance of sleep! Although I had an eventful, fun weekend, I am feeling it right around my eyes. I spent too much time running around and being busy and totally missed out on rest.

One good thing did come out of this past weekend. I started to think about why I keep falling for this girl. Ready for a list....because here it comes.

• She has a way of seeing through me
• She makes me smile
• She has the most amazing smile
• She doesn't play stupid games
• She's the one who I can be myself around

A bit sappy. Sorry. Now to finish with something manly to regain my status as a male.

I LOVE FOOTBALL. Done

Thats A Good Point Bear, We Should Try That....

I am absolutely crazy about this weather...it makes my heart sing. Speaking of singing, I think it behooves you to go to my bands show and hear me sing. October 11th...DEAL!

In other news. I have decided to grow my hair out. Lets hear how long you think I should get it.